The true source of self-love 6-part series
With the many definitions of love that exist, let me share with you why starting with self-love is the most important thing next to God.
She humbly walks with pride
Unconsciously confident with every stride
Her internal glow warms her heart
The peace with self, she’ll never part
Some may ask “what is your source?”
She answers assertively, with no remorse
She reflects upon the day she began
The day she decided to take a stand
To satisfy her soul… To begin to feel whole
She took time to live… To intrinsically forgive
And discovered her true source of self-love
Transcended her spirit, as a precious dove
Connected to the highest source
With love, peace, and joy as its reward
Her understanding shifted still
It allowed her to experience the thrill
Of knowing the work is already done
It's our God, our Master, the creator to succumb
That is when it all becomes clear.
Where joy and love is what brings the tears
When you're filled so high, the overflow reaches so far
Connecting with others while investing in who you are.
It’s a beautiful thing, that experience will bring
So begin within and let your love sing.
~ Chantelle Simone
Embodying love is a choice. Seeking the truth about where it comes from, how to get it and what it feels like, is the input needed to experience its output. Some may feel their self-love is solid, saying “I do love myself” or “I don’t hate myself”. That may be the case, but the question is, how do we know we are truly embodying self-love?
Self-love is manifested in many ways and self-value can be expressed by a great saying from Michelle Obama, “When they go low, we go high.” When you value your life so high, you avoid being reduced to a level lower than you. You become the thermostat rather than the thermometer, which will bring people to your level rather than comply with theirs. When we value who we are, we value where we are and what we deserve.
How do you know if you value yourself and have self-respect? Do you walk with your chest puffed out, wave like the queen, or intimidate others to demand respect? None of that is necessary. It can be as simple as choosing self-respect, being assertive, forgiving yourself and investing in you.
Respect -Self-respect shows up in your relationships and the people you keep around you, the way you dress and take care of yourself, how you speak and communicate with others, the places you visit and the things you see. When you respect yourself, you foster an environment that is fluid, where you are valued and you can contribute and receive. You carry yourself with integrity and make clothing choices that compliment who you are rather than striving to get attention. You avoid hearing derogatory words that will de-value your age, sex, race or religion. If you are confronted with it, you gracefully reject the premise of the notion and move on.
You ensure your surroundings are conducive to honoring everything about you. You respect yourself in every manner that it becomes a consistent innate reaction. Respect comes from a sense of personal value or self-worth. When you highly regard that, you will naturally respect yourself.
Assertiveness — Self-Assertiveness is the feeling that you know, that you know, what you know. It’s about being sure of yourself. When you know you have something to offer and truly believe it, you will take a stand for it. When your colleague gets the promotion because they had an extra coffee with the boss, yet you are more qualified — you take a stand for yourself. When you are simply overlooked because you are a woman, you take a stand for yourself. When people say you’re too young or too old, you take a stand for yourself and show them who you are regardless of demographic. It’s about knowing who you are regardless of the hurdles, barriers or challenges that are in your way. Letting others know where you draw the line in the sand of what you are willing to accept at any moment.
Forgiving — Self-forgiving is one of the most challenging things to do. Yet it has one of the greatest effects because it impacts every aspect of self-love. Not forgiving is like drinking poison expecting the other person to die. By holding on to unforgiveness, we walk with a weight on us that does not belong to us. The mistakes we made last week, the people we hurt, the disrespectful things we said that we cannot take back. FORGIVE yourself. When you forgive, you will acknowledge, learn, release and move on. It’s like having a conversation with oneself in the mirror.
Hey self, so what you did yesterday, yea, that was dumb. It was insensitive and you hurt other people. Why did you do that? A huh, right, because of that. What could you have done differently? Great. So do that next time, okay? Now go continue to be fabulous. Have a great day!
If you can’t forgive yourself, you won’t be able to forgive others. Search your mind, your thoughts, your spirit and see if there is anything that you need to forgive yourself for today and do it.
Investing — Self-investing is not something we speak much about, yet it is a great indicator of how much we value who we are. Where are you spending your money? Are you investing in your mind, body, spirit? Ladies, shoes and handbags don’t count (as much as I love them)! When you buy something of value, how do you treat it? A brick of gold, you would lock in a safety deposit box. A sports car, you would park in 2 parking spots farthest from all the action. Even money, we put it in the bank to secure it instead of under our mattress. So what about us? If we truly value ourselves, we should be willing to invest in ourselves. What books are we reading to fuel our mind, what food we are inputting in our body, do we spend quiet time to connect to our spirit? Invest in programs that develop your mind, expand you awareness of life by traveling, learn about new cultures, experience something different and take care of the inside and outside of your body.
What is the maintenance of your life worth? Is $1,000 too much to buy an online program that enhances your mind? Is paying an extra $2.00 to upgrade to a salad instead of accepting the standard side order of fries a priority? Will you set an alarm to wake up 15 minutes earlier to pray or meditate? The way we invest in ourselves is also a reflection of our self-worth and self-love.
This six-part series of “The true source of Self-Love” have outlined 6 major aspects of our self-love
1) Its value.
2) Where to find it?
3) How to protect it?
4) How to connect to it?
5) How to choose it?
6) How do we know we have it?
It was a pleasure to share these aspects of self-love with you and now it is time to reflect on all the perspectives given. Pick one thing, one area that you need to improve on. I believe this is truly the foundation of life. God is love and love trumps all. We must love ourselves in order to truly love others. Then we are free to deep dive into ourselves and determine our unique significance, our innateness and our gifts that makes us unique.
When love floods the mind, we make better choices. Making decisions of a sound mind are more aligned to who we truly are. We foster healthy thought patterns and it overall helps our mental health, forming great brain structures and results.
Listen to your own heart and follow your own path rather than work to achieve the dreams of others which will ultimately cause a void in your life. If you do not pursue the goals that truly fulfill you, you have missed the point of living a purposeful life. Foster it, develop it and share it with the world. It’s how we ignite our lives and truly live on purpose.
For any further assistance visit www.chantellesimone.com to book a complimentary consultation or for further information.
Peace, Blessings, Prosperity and Love,
MNLP, MTLT, MCHt, MNLPC, MBBLSS
Subject Matter Expert on Purpose & Identity |Mental Master Coach | Educational Speaker
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